By restyourpaws | October 26, 2025
Anticipatory Grief
Submitted by Rest Your Paws
For a PDF of this resource, click here.
Sharing your home with a furry companion is one of life’s greatest joys. Sadly, our pets cannot live forever and, as Queen Elizabeth II very wisely said, “Grief is the price we pay for love”, but often we start grieving before we even experience loss.
What Is Anticipatory Grief?
Grief is generally thought of as the wave of emotions that hit us after we experience loss. However, for many of us, the grief journey begins when we start to anticipate our final months, weeks, or even days with our pets.
Recognising Anticipatory Grief
This may occur after a vet visit where a terminal illness is diagnosed, or when you first notice that your elderly companion is slowing down. Once we realise our time with our pets is limited, it is natural that we begin to feel ‘anticipatory grief’. We are forced to consider the loss of our companions before their death has even occurred.
These emotions may feel overwhelming, but they are a natural part of the grieving journey. Recognising and accepting them is an essential step, and we hope this resource provides you with comfort and strategies to navigate this difficult time.
Coping With Anticipatory Grief
Be Kind to Yourself and Seek Professional Support
Providing palliative care for our loved ones can be extremely challenging, both physically and mentally. Managing medications, cleaning up after accidents, and encouraging them to eat all contribute to a substantial burden. It’s important to acknowledge the weight of this responsibility and the effort it takes.
The palliative care process also forces us to watch as our companions lose their independence and experience change to their once-familiar personalities. Be kind to yourself; feelings of overwhelming stress and sadness are natural and you are not alone in experiencing them.
The fear of the unknown weighs heavy on us during the grieving process: How will the disease progress? How will I know when it’s time? What happens on the day? Of course, no pet parent should have to make these decisions on their own. You should always seek professional advice from your veterinarian who can help alleviate your fears of the unknown and guide you through decision making with quality of life discussio.
Plan Ahead
We all want our pets to pass peacefully and painlessly. Unfortunately, this rarely happens without the intervention of euthanasia. Planning ahead for euthanasia allows us to take away the unknowns of ‘how, where and when’, and provide the pain-free, peaceful ending that our pets deserve.
It can be incredibly hard to think ahead and plan for the inevitable. Sometimes we even feel guilty that we are considering the death of our companion and grieving when they’re still with us. Remember, you’re not giving up; you’re shifting focus to keeping your companion as happy and as comfortable as they can be, and treasuring your time together. We have created a useful resource in this pack to help you plan ahead called: How will I know when it’s time?
You are not alone in making these decisions; reach out to your veterinarian or our team so we can help guide and support you through the process.
Enjoy the Precious Time You Have Together
Well-meaning friends and family might encourage you to make the most of your remaining time, but that’s often easier said than done. It’s important to remember that it’s okay to feel desperately sad while still cherishing the moments you share.
If you’d like more ideas on how to make the most of the time you have left with your beloved pet, visit our website.
We have also seen many families make a ‘bucket list’ with some of their pet’s favourite activities. Ticking them off one-by-one will help to create many meaningful memories and bring joy to you, your family and your beloved pet.
Anticipatory Grief: Final Thoughts
Grief is a natural emotion when facing the prospect of life without your companion. There is no right or wrong way to grieve and anticipatory grief is different for everyone. Don’t underestimate how stressful end-of-life care can be. Decisions will be weighing on your mind, the physical delivery of care can be exhausting, and the grief can be all-consuming.
Be aware of this and look after yourself and your loved ones during this time. Don’t be afraid to reach out to your regular veterinarian or our team for more information on specialised pet loss support and access to grief counsellors.
Take each day as it comes. Plan ahead and work with your veterinarian to shape your companion’s final journey into something truly special and memorable.
For a PDF of this resource, click here.
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